Yup...it has been one year since I officially became The Serial Bachelorette! I am not sure how to commemorate this moment! Should I be celebrating this occasion or just trying to quietly figure out how I even got here!
Well what I do know is, one year ago today, I broke up with the should-be love of my adult life. I wrote about him in my first blog, 'Stop Fantasizing!'
Now that you read that, there is no need to give him more air time in this post than he has earned! Three month of courtship followed by a pitiful (2) weeks of a 'serious' relationship only gives you a quick blurb! Enough for me to say...I dodged a bullet there, he talked about marriage and kids within the next 1.5 years max...well his current girlfriend is 22! You tell me how serious he was about that? All talk no action!
Anywho, moving right along...I have decided to do my year in review to catch everyone up on my journey from that tough break up to the place I am right now! Single, Sexy, and FREE-ing myself from the confines of my teenage fantasies! It all began in...
August 2009:
The day after my breakup, I get a call from an old friend! He seems to fancy me and he, for the moment, takes my mind off of the break up. He is a good guy but long distance. I decide to keep in touch because I could really use the friendship.
September 2009:
I re-meet a gorgeous guy from several month prior. We exchange information and go out on a date. He claims to 'love' me from date 1. That's weird but he is FINE so I keep in contact!
I, also, employ my 'Fearless' motto and in the spirit of taking charge, I finally cop to having a 10 year old flame that has been burning with a college crush (aka The Flame as I will refer to him from now on)
October 2009-December 2009:
This was a busy month! Old Friend sends for me to come visit him and plans a lovely weekend! It is so nice of a trip that I drive back up there the very next weekend! There is some chemistry but in all honesty the specs of the relationship are too similar to the one I just had with my ex...factor in the distance, and yeah, friendship is the only thing on the menu!
Back at home I have a juggling act...phone bonin' everyday with The Flame and a myriad of experiences with the guys from the Me & My Crazy World and the Double Date blogs!
January 2010:
I have a new lease on my dating life! FEARLESS...I declare 2010 as my year! Things are developing with The Flame, as planned. Even though, he is out of commission until March, due to work obligations, we speak every night and plan to see each other as soon as possible! He does however hit me with 'the disclaimer'! You know the one..."I am focusing on my career right now! Not looking for a girlfriend!" But, yet and still, these men want boyfriend privileges...smh...
February 2010:
The Flame has my complete attention. Even though he's far away, no one compares! Period! No one is giving me that giddy feeling but him! That is until a random college acquaintance appears on the scene and begins to pursue me relentlessly!
March 2010-May 2010:
The battle is on between The Flame and The Newcomer! I still want The Flame but The Newcomer's game is strong! Clearly, he's a competitor but nature. After months, I finally meet up with The Flame, and from the moment we hugged and I inhaled his fragrance, I feel the spark, he gives me those butterflies! BUT, his nonchalance coupled with 'the disclaimer' worry me. Unfortunately, I think I have to let him go...no matter how much I want him!
June 2010:
The Newcomer pushes for the relationship! I am not ready but I relent! A million thoughts race through my mind all at once; so loud I can't hear myself answer! Can I make this work? Is he really the one? Am I jumping the gun? Am I settling? I honestly don't know...but, with hesitation, I leap!
July 2010:
Damn! It didn't work! We are not compatible...he's strong 'game' did not cross over to a 'strong' reality! We're over...for good...I think...The Serial Bachelorette lives...
August 2010:
The here and now! Oh boy...it has been one hell of a ride, peppered with so many stories and revelations (that I will share)...
As for me, I currently have a few irons in the fire! I've been asked out on a series of REAL dates, finally, by a nice gentleman. Out of nowhere, The Flame is back in the picture, still giving me those butterflies and I've been fielding calls from a few other prospects...
I guess I am hot again! Go me!
But wait, it just hit me...what time of the year is it again!?! Sh!t! It is almost Fall, I might only be in demand because of those damn Winter Wars...again!
I want thank all of those that stuck with me throughout this 1st year! There are MANY more stories, advice, and off beat opinions to come!
Thank you for taking this journey with me!
—The S.B.
Interesting posts. Hmmmmm... I'm loving the fact the fact that you're bold enough to date the way guys do. I've been hanging out with one of my guy friends and watching him interact with the women in his life. When I asked him why he was such a dog he responded "I'm not in a relationship." I think that most women end up being 40 and single because they spend so much time settling down with a guy who isn't settled down with them (still dating others). Then they wake up years later to realize that they wasted their time committed to someone who wasn't, in any way, committed to them.
ReplyDeleteWith all that said... there's a fine line between being a Serial Bachelorette and a Promiscuous Girl.
Good luck in your dating endeavors... I'll be reading.
@ simply
ReplyDeleteYou make an excellent point but I don't think she is dating like a man cuz if she was she would be sexing all these dudes and since she doesn't say she then she must not be. plus i read back and any woman that can go a year without getting it is a saint lmbo cuz that can't be me! I don't think "promiscuous" is even a word that should be brought up right now. she is having fun like a single lady should be. She is dating like me and my friends only difference is I do love my boys up a little bit, then i will leave them if they act funny. where i am rite now it os my way or the highway.
Ms. Bachelorette have fun now because the right one will come along when he sees that you are happy and confident. I love the blog please keep writing cuz I am reading